When Her Voice is Gone

Last night I was struck with a bolt of emotion lightning. I could feel the searing pain from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. My daughter had just broken the news to me that my wife’s voice message was no longer available, the telephone number no longer existed. The message on the phone kept repeating “The number you have dialled no longer exists”. NO LONGER EXIST. The three of us had dialled that number from time to time just to hear Yolanda’s voice, perhaps it made us feel connected and that she was only a call away, perhaps it was just to hear her voice or to share a memory. It was as if we were transported back to day 1. The acknowledgment that Yolanda, a best friend, a wife, a mother, a daughter a soulmate was never going to be with us again.

I felt the pain of my daughter as we embraced and sobbed, that ugly tormented cry that only those who have experienced catastrophic loss can muster. The cry that comes from every corner of your body bring along all the pain of memories gone by. I tried to walk to my room but my legs were unable to carry me.

Yolanda your voice has gone and I fear that over time I will struggle to hear it, however your memory, your legacy will never be forgotten.