Grief my friend, I only call you my friend as you tend to hang around me night and day. Your presence is never far from me. I wake up in the middle of the night and there you are sitting in the corner of my room watching over me. I go for a walk and I can hear your footsteps following closely behind. I sip my early morning coffee and I see you staring longingly at my cup, perhaps you are also hoping the coffee will give you strength to go another day. Your presence is constant, when I laugh, when I am happy when I desire to just take the next step you are there.

My friend Grief, I wish to tell you that you were never invited into my life. Your presence, although a necessary part of my journey, was and is totally unplanned. Do I want you to be hanging around day and night? Do I want you to follow my every move? Do I want you to read my mind? The answer is a categorical no. Yes I get it that you are as a result of having loved and been loved. As friends are able to have honest open and transparent chats with one another I feel that our friendship has matured to this level. I hope not to offend you in any way but trust that you will understand and also respect me as a friend when I tell you this.

Your presence is an unplanned complication. I am sorry that I might offend you but perhaps we could come to a better arrangement that works for both of us. I look forward to your response.

Your friend.


6 thoughts on “Grief an unplanned complication

  1. There is no dark corner where Grief hides and in darkness forever present. Uninvited into our dwellings and happy places, into our minds whether we are at rest or awake and a longterm companion but not a friend

  2. Your post is an excellent example of externalising the problem. If you look grief in the face you can deal with this unwanted friend far better than when when it is part of your identity. You are clearly living the principles of Narrative Therapy, well done!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s