Yolanda passed away 20 months ago. Sometimes it feels as if her passing was just yesterday and on other days it appears as a vision on a distant horizon.
Life has changed forever. It has changed for all who had interacted with Yolanda. Even though she was a mere 1.39m in height she certainly occupied a far larger space in all of our lives. With her death we can all feel robbed in the cruelest of ways. I however believe that we all had to exam our loss and the massive destruction caused in our lives. This examination would highlight the gigantic gaps in our life skill set. Death has caused us to be confronted by these real observations, we are mortal, we will experience death and loss in our lives, we need a support system, we are not in control, we will need to learn and acquire new skills. All of this will seem to be very overwhelming, at times it felt as if I was drowning and that I wouldn’t be able to survive. There were times when I felt strong and emboldened to take on the challenge. I learnt to live in the moment and focus on the next step.
I have gained a greater appreciation for life and the relationships that surround me. I have acquired a greater understanding of those who are going through similar journeys. I have also been able to look at the positives in this “nightmare” in which I find myself playing one of the lead characters.
Deaths gift has been a different perspective on life. A perspective that I am grateful for as I believe it has added to my life skill set. So in some weird and wonderful way by circumstances beyond my control I am being molded by an artist who loves and admires his work. An artist who patiently and skillfully tweaks and adjusts his sculpture until he is satisfied with the finished product.